29.1 ...

Hey Everybody.

Again, it's been a while...and now I am a 29 years and 1 day old. I am still living at Stony Point Center in New York state, struggling with what it means to be in an intentional inter-religious community committed to nonviolence and peace building and all that entails.

Through an interfaith young adult farming internship I participated in this summer, I have found that I am, in fact, an activist, and that I am very interested in living out the idea of nonviolence in my everyday life. Yes, that means in participating in the dismantling of systems of injustice, but it also means participating in the creation of peace. This is where my heart truly lives, and where my blog is going to be changing. I am hoping to share my creative acts here. I am not going to vow to write everyday, or take a new photograph, or write a new song....that is something I would fail at. But, I am going to challenge myself to live out my experience of creation through my words, lens and voice....and whatever other means I find along the way.

To start this new practice off, I want to share with you a poem I wrote on my first Eid (that I was aware of, at least). After an intense Ramadan, I was struck with the beauty of Islam and the importance of my Muslim family in my life--and that despite my best efforts, I remain irrevocably and unapologetically Christian.

My Little m.

I grew up in a left to right,

top to bottom

world.

Where God was three people

and souls were lost and found daily.

Where I bowed my head and held tight my eyes

as I laced together my hands, finger in and finger out,

my lips silently moved as I spoke words I knew

but don’t ever remember learning.

And as I have moved through the cycles of the moon,

as Saturn returns to the place of my birth,

I am finding a world that flows from the right to the left

and God is praised with every breath, with the entire body

and the voice in prayer is audibly shared, communally recited as

God is just one.

And I am aware of my little m

as I pray in motion, I bow in prostration,

with my elbows up and my angels Salaamed

and I wonder if my little m is a big M in disguise.

As if I am a child riding a bike with training wheels

unsure

if I can take the next step and say those words

from my heart with witnesses present

as I don’t know if I can believe them and trust in them,

AMIN.

And so maybe my m stays small and I stay in awe

of my body in motion, and my call to prayer

is a call to be present in a life we all share,

and my three part God, stays in three parts—but three parts of one whole,

and my whole soul seeks it’s path with honesty and an earnest ear,

listening for the waves,

entering from the left and receding from the right.

I stare down the shoreline and

I notice as I turn my head that now the waves

come from the right and leave from the left and

it is just one ocean and

there is just one shore and

we are all God’s people

waiting and

seeking and

listening

as the waves continually venture towards our souls.

copyright katie rains 2010

Peace to you all as this fall brings the start of many holiday seasons and many seasons of preparation.

love, katie